putting the pressure on the PR

It took me a looooong time to get past the 3 mile range, and when I signed up for my first 10k, I was scared I’d have to be carted to the finish line. But I didn’t, and I actually started to enjoy it. I also noticed my race times getting a teensy bit shorter each race.

First 10k

I used to read other running blogs and think ‘man they are so fast’ or ‘why can’t I be that fast?’ and try to mimic other runner’s training schedules and workouts. I learned rather quickly that only sets you up for heartbreak and injuries.

I am now at a place in my running where I truly only compete with myself. Yes I love placing in my age group, but it’s not about that for me anymore. I really enjoy putting my all into a race, almost where you feel like you’ve got nothing left…. and then you push a little bit more. I live for that feeling. The last time I strongly felt that was the Nike Women’s Half Marathon in DC.

A little post race bling didn’t hurt either

In that race I knocked a solid 17 minutes off of my PR (my first and only other half, almost 8 months prior) and that was during marathon training, where a lot of my long runs were slow. To run sub 8:30’s for 13.1 miles made me feel like an elite in my own mind. It was an amazing feeling!

The problem is that I now crave that feeling. I crave the to-do listing, goal setting, and checking off completed items satisfaction.

This would accurately describe me to a T

I have 2 halfs scheduled in September, one a trail that is just for fun, but the other I’d really like to beat my current PR on. I have an achievable goal (knock 2ish minutes off my time) and am loosely following a training plan that incorporates speed and trail work to get stronger. But for some reason I just feel disappointed in myself. I feel like I should be faster, able to hold certain paces longer, and stronger than I am. When I compare my time and mileage to last year’s, I see immense improvement, but that is not enough. I still feel like I’m not hitting my true potential, even though I’m likely on the right road to getting there.

I realized one morning as I got up early to run last week that I wasn’t even looking forward to the run. Yes, we all have days like that but this was different…. my legs felt tired and I just wasn’t in the mood for it. I suddenly realized that my body was reacting to the disappointment I’d been exuding about my speed. I’m putting so much pressure on the PR that I forgot the main purpose of why I run now… because I love it! I don’t love every single run, but I love being a runner and getting my run on. Sometimes you can train your little heart out and still not PR… and sometimes you can feel totally unprepared and do great. But you know what? when it comes down to it, it’s not about that at all. Because really? Everyday that I get up and get a run in, is a successful day.

and getting to enjoy this scenery? an added bonus

I think it’s important to take time and be grateful for the ability to run. not to be fast or long distance…but just to be able to run. Sometimes even us type a’s need a little reality check 🙂

What is your biggest struggle as a runner? 

Any other type a runners out there?